I became an "almost veteran unschooler" this year as my oldest child turned 12. I went through the decision-making over to school or not to school,¹ and became enraptured with Waldorf education when Jon turned four. I was almost taken in by the cloth dolls, wooden blocks, nice colors, and soft-spoken teachers. What changed our minds was the fact that we would be driving two hours a day to have our son be part of a simulated home environment! Sounded pretty stupid, so we wrote off the $100 admission fee as a donation and Jon stayed home.

Jon was part of the Sesame Street generation. I don't know if it hurt him any, and I certainly liked spending a year or so in the company of Big Bird. I knew Mr. Rogers intimately that year, (and graciously put up with the Land of Maple Leaf.¹ Speedy Delivery!) As my parenting skills got better and I realized that hiding in the television room of our sixteen room city house with Jon was getting us nowhere, we ventured outside and into the big, wide world. We went to parks and canal museums, took long walks, met friends, and kept the television off lots of the time. I guess you could say that Jon came home again.

When Jon was six, a group of local homeschoolers was forming a homeschool group, complete with a teacher. It sounded wonderful, and for some it was. I sent him off one September day when he was six with a new shirt, Star Trek lunch box, and pencil box. His overwhelming enthusiasm for life got him safely through five months of HomeSchool,¹ as it was called, before he and his father decided to call it quits. Too much bell-ringing, forced Writing Workshop, too much "fold your paper this way" and "draw Spring here, Summer here, Fall here, and Winter here" for Jon's taste. I was still trying to just get him to shut up and just get along. Anyhow, to continue, Jon came back home.

When Jon was seven, it was a tough, tough time. This was my school at home time, and I decided all by myself that the world was a tough place, Jon couldn't just stay home and expect to do nothing, that his schooled counterparts were becoming educated not three blocks away, and that it was by-God time to do some serious work. The kitchen table became a battleground. The typical scene was this:

"Jon (or Jonathan, as he was still known), it's time to do some reading work/math/science/whatever."

"No way."

"Now, don't make me angry. It's time, sit down, we're going to do some work now."

"I'd rather puke."

"Now, Jonathan, I'm going to count to ten...Jon, get back here. I'm going to call the school. Look, I'm getting up! I'm dialing, "Hello give me the principal."

I can't continue. I need to go hug Jon.

There, I'm back. I'm glad to say that by the time Jon turned eight, our financial problems became so overwhelming that I began to let up on him. I read out loud, but that was all, and always fun books. We covered the Redwall series twice that year, plus some. Jon and I both came home. The past four years have been a growing, letting-go time for me and for Jon. It was difficult for a product of 14 years of public education to just let my son wander around the outside of the property, sit in a tree, talk to himself, check the fridge for new developments, and play Nintendo. "What are you interested in, Jon?" "I don't know." "Do you want to try soccer again?" "I don't think so." "Is there anything you are interested in doing especially? What about a chess club?" "Naaaahhhh." "How about your social life?" "I have Tim, that's all I need." "Want to join a choral group? Your voice is superb..." "No." "How about piano lessons?" "Nah." "Why don't you read a book?" "I read a book already."

This year Jon is apprenticing with his father, who is a computer consultant. He has a new pair of pants and two good shirts. He wakes up early, hairsprays his hair, and is ready to start the day. His enthusiasm is boundless, and a joy to see.

He is learning hardware and software from the inside out, and learning from the best. The best part of the apprentice thing is that his enthusiasm for other things is coming out! He didn't flinch when I suggested that we order Key to Algebra, he just suggested that we do it together, with his dad if at all possible. I do believe that Jon is home for good.

Know what he was doing when I went in to hug him just now? Reading a book, that's what. Raptor Red, in case you're interested.

This article first appeared in the November-December, 1999